You're not behind

Not a subscriber yet? Sign up here

In last week’s issue, I asked you all to identify a habit that aligns with the person you want to become.

One reader replied with a powerful question.

“What if I don’t know who I want to become?”

This question struck me — because honestly, I don’t always know either.

I have goals I’m working towards. But sometimes, I look at those goals and wonder why I set them. Will achieving them actually make me happier? Or am I chasing something because I think I should?

Determining the person we aspire to be is one of the main ideas of Steps Worth Taking. Through this newsletter, I want to explore that question with you. To share exercises, prompts, and perspectives that help you better define your direction…and take intentional steps towards it.

But before we dive into all that, I want to start with this:

It’s okay to not know who you want to become.

Especially in your 20s.

There is so much pressure right now to “figure it out.” To have a 5-year plan. To be exceptional. To build a business. To become a thought leader. To be somebody.

Why?

Because it feels like everyone else already is.

We see 19-year-old crypto millionaires.
22-year-old startup founders.
25-year-olds giving TED talks.

And suddenly, we feel behind. We start asking:

Everyone’s online presence is a carefully curated story — meant to pull you in and make you admire them. But we never see the full picture.

We don’t see the low moments.
We don’t see the failures.

And when we compare ourselves to those stories, we’re comparing our full, messy, beautiful lives to someone else’s edited highlight reel.

If you cherry-picked your best moments, I bet they’d look pretty amazing too.

So before we even begin to figure out who we want to be, we have to let go of this constant comparison. We have to quiet the noise so we can hear ourselves.

Because knowing who you want to become takes deep self-reflection. It requires understanding what truly drives you. It requires getting to know you — not the version of you that performs for others, but the version that’s honest, curious, and open.

And that’s not easy if you’re constantly feeding your brain someone else’s idea of success.

We’re not just our careers.
We’re not just our goals.

We’re our relationships, our values, our experiences, our memories, our laughter, our struggles.

You are made up of many things — and that’s what makes this process complicated. But also, incredibly exciting.

Because if you don’t know exactly who you want to become…

You have a blank slate.
You can choose.
You’re free.

If your entire life was planned out from the start, how boring would that be?

No twists.
No surprises.
No discovery.

Not knowing who you want to be isn’t a weakness, it’s a starting point.

It’s potential, not limitation.

So if you’re feeling lost, that’s okay. Embrace the uncertainty. Be curious. Follow what feels meaningful, even if it doesn’t make sense yet.

Because you will figure it out.

Sometimes, it just takes time.

🌱 This week’s step worth taking

This week, focus on something simple but powerful: joy.

The goal? Identify what truly makes you happy — and find small ways to prioritize it.

Here’s your step-by-step:

1. Set aside 15 quiet, undistracted minutes.

2. Find a peaceful spot — no phone, no noise, just you and your thoughts.

3. Spend 10 minutes writing down what brings you joy.

4. Use the last 5 minutes to choose one thing you’ll prioritize this week — just for your happiness.

Because if you reach every goal but still don’t feel fulfilled…

What was all that work for?

📚 Worth the Read

If you liked today’s issue, I highly recommend:

• Start with Why by Simon Sinek — most people focus on what they want to do and how they’ll do it…but forget to ask why. Sinek flips the script: great leaders, and fulfilled individuals, start with purpose first.

Though written with organizations in mind, the core message applies to personal growth too.

🔄 Misstep of the week

I’m a perfectionist. Some days, it pushes me forward. Other days, it holds me back.

This past week, I planned to create marketing materials for this newsletter…but I spent so much time obsessing over making them perfect that I didn’t post a single thing.

Perfectionism is a double-edged sword.

It can push you to do great work — or paralyze you from doing anything at all.

This week’s lesson: done is better than perfect. And setting realistic expectations is what helps you actually make progress.

🙌 Step Spotlight

Your morning routine can set the tone of your entire day.

Many of us wake up and immediately reach for our phones. But not Scott.

Scott makes the most of his morning by doing push-ups, taking a cold shower, and spending some time in quiet meditation to set intentions for the day — all before picking up his phone.

Scott says this helps him start his days with a sense of alertness and empowerment.

Keep it up Scott 💪

Want to be featured in next week’s Step Spotlight? Respond to this issue with a step you’ve taken that you’re proud of.

Until next week.

Step by step,

Nathan

P.S. Me trying to make marketing content

Follow along with steps I’m taking on
Instagram, LinkedIn, X